Jealousy and Insecurity?

I was talking to Dub Dub last night after we had dinner. I was asking him about his very first boyfriend and how they got to know each other. I just don't know why but every time I ask him about it or every time I think about his ex-boyfriend I feel so jealous. What happened was he met Jonathan in the public swimming pool. He was attracted to him because he had a nice body. He made the move to get Jonathan's mobile number. I continued to ask him why he asked for his number. What was he after Jonathan? He said it was all about lust. All about sex. He asked to stop asking him about Jonathan because it will only hurt me in the long run. He told me past is past and I should dwell in that fact. He told me that I was way over different from Jonathan or from all the boyfriends that he had. I'm his sixth boyfriend and he is my fifth. He is way different from all my other boyfriends too. He is the sweetest guy I've ever known. I wanna keep him here in my heart forever if possible. I wanna be with this guy. I wanna be with someone worth all the love in the world. I wanna be with Myqel. The one I'm willing to give my whole heart too. I miss him so much. He'll be home soon. I remember his message last Tuesday night. He was telling me how he missed me. How he wanna be always beside me. How he wanna wrap his arms around me. How he love to kissed me and how he wanted to rest his head on my chest. He told me not to worry will be living together soon. We will be with each other, day-in and day-out. I miss him. *sobs!* Oh my, a tear just rolled down my cheek. I hate being very emotional every time I update my blog. Hahaha! I'm waiting for my shift to end. It's 6:04 on my watch. I need to be next to him. I wanna see him sleeping soundly beside me. Where I can feel his arms around me. When we can breathe the same air. I wanna be with this guy. I wanna be with Dub Dub. I wanna stay forever in-love with my sweet prince. My sweet Myqel.